Marathon Therapy and Ultra Weirdos: What Running Gave John Calabrese When Life Got Hard

John Calabrese didn’t expect running to become a core part of his identity. For years, it was just something he did when he had to—mostly for military fitness tests or the occasional half marathon. It wasn’t until later, after a difficult divorce and some major life changes, that he found himself coming back to the sport for something more.

He signed up for his first marathon during a season that felt uncertain. He needed a goal. A structure. Something to work toward when everything else felt unclear. What he found in the training process surprised him. It wasn’t the race that changed him—it was the rhythm of the long runs, the clarity that came with being alone on the road, and the way showing up each week made him feel like himself again.

But John’s path with running wasn’t linear. After that marathon, he dealt with burnout, injury, and the pressure that comes from running “for the feed.” He stepped away. He stopped chasing the numbers. And when he came back, he came back differently.

The second version of his running life wasn’t about fast paces or medals. It was about trails. Community. Finding people who welcomed him in without judgment or expectation. The trail and ultra world gave him something the road never had—a sense of belonging.

He started saying yes to harder efforts. To late-night races. To ultra events where you might get a cheesesteak handed to you at mile 30. The weirdness, the grit, the chaos of it all—it made sense. And for the first time, running felt like it was on his terms.

Now, John runs not to prove something, but to stay grounded. His story is a reminder that the sport is allowed to evolve. That sometimes the most important miles are the quiet ones. And that it’s okay to come back to running in an entirely new way.

Lessons Learned from John's First Marathon Journey

• Coming back to running can be more emotional than starting. It takes a different kind of strength to return to something after injury, grief, or burnout.

• The pressure to perform fades when you run for yourself. Once John stopped chasing numbers, running started to feel like his again.

• Trail people are the best kind of weird. From cheesesteaks at aid stations to post-race hangs, the ultra community brought connection without judgment.

• Your relationship with running is allowed to change. Roads, trails, ultras, or time off—it’s all part of the process, not a step backward.

• You don’t need a finish line to feel like a runner. The most meaningful miles aren’t always tied to races. Sometimes, they’re the ones no one else sees.

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